I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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