dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
