brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
If that was your dad, he is hot
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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