...so i touched it.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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