Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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