Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
How naked do you want me to be?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
