chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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