This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
this is an emotional support booty call
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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