I can tuck mytits in my pants
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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