Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.

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(517): View more from Michigan

you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!

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(703): View more from Virginia

She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine

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(908): View more from New Jersey

...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos

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(716): View more from New York

Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor

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(514): View more from Quebec

Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?

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(208): View more from Idaho

Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him

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