I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
