Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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