So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
