my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
