How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
