i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
