I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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