the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
