To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
