when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
