KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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