She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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