so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
