East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
