I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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