Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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