For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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