So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
