Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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