Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
