The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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