So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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