i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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