Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
