I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
