was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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