My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize