so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
