Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize
