Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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