Where is the hickey?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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