I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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