operation have a gay friend backfired
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Bring me that man meat
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
