We should be called the Road Head Warriors
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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