We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
