I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I got inside last night via doggy door
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
