escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
