what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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