once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize