I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
